Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
There's always time for handjobs
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
In other news: I found out that my mom used to fuck my newest fuck buddy's dad when they were in school.
Really stoned me is having a very serious, intent conversation with my mom about egg rolls and koolaid flavors.
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
Randomize
