he invited me to an all week drinking party at his house. apparently he knows the key to my heart is booze shaped.
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
my dog ran away and came back with a marajuana plant. what are you doing tonight?
i'm naked playing bejeweled blitz in your bed. this is both a forewarning and an apology
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
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