I used a bag of wine as a pillow last night.
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
Just paid my credit card bill at the bar. This phone makes it so I never have to leave
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
Ugh. I need to go to the store, but I'm too lazy. Whatever shall I do? That girls still passed out. I should steal her car
Randomize
