No, drunk sperm still make babies.
I threw up so much beer last night that my puke had a nice head on it.
You turned to me, asked if I was having fun yet, and then threw up onto my jeans. Thanks for the awesome first time partying experience
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
Apparently the last thing they remember of me was me stumbing into a bathroom, then falling out 5 minutes later clutching a butter knife repeating "ketamine goes in my face hole"
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
You kept mumbling that you could become one with the carpet as you proceeded to give yourself the worst carpet burn I have ever seen
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
If the guys trying to booty call text me could see me right now in some raggedy pajamas with toothpaste down the front of my shirt eating pepperoni out of the package they might change their minds
Randomize
