So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
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