guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
In America we eat man semen.
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
I'm having a martini with dinner. A new level of class.
I'm stoned and eating mustard, also a new level of class.
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
We fucked, she finished, high fived me, the pulled a celebratory pack of gushers out of her purse for each of us. I'm going to marry your sister dude.
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
things i am: 1) still drunk 2) still wearing my leopard onesie 3) still gonna make my 9am lecture despite the odds CAN I GET A HIGH FIVE
Randomize
