you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
Just witnessed a walk of shame by a guy in a half gorilla suit. It's going to be a good day.
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
your cat followed me a mile away from your house. if it doesn't come back, i'm sorry, but I needed to get laid tonight.
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
I didn't wake up drunk this year...I must be getting soft
Yeah I guess quad-fisting Miller Lites just isn't as effective as it used to be
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
Randomize
