she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
Randomize
