WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
she passed out facedown in my lap while I was playing piano. 11 years of piano lessons finally paid for themselves.
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
When you consider the sheer number of events that had to occur in order to prevent me from fucking her, there must be a god
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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