my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
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