I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
Im covered in vodka and melted gummys. Fuck summer.
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
Randomize
