You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
i ended up making out with my new neighbor in a stranger's car that we found unlocked on a driveway somewhere. apparently drunk self never say "no" to adventure.
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Randomize
