My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
I just texted him and asked him to keep some in case I need help sealing the deal.
Girl Scout cookies are like roofies for fat chicks.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
Shame - the story of my life.
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