Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
home. puking in laundry basket.
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
You just stood up, raised your glass and said, "I'd like to thank the academy" then fell through a glass table. THAT'S why we cut you off.
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
