Sometimes when I see pregnant women, I wonder what position they were in when they got knocked up. Then I gag a little.
I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
Just spent a extra 20 minutes on the phone with the lady from unemployment talking about how to make the best brownies.
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
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