oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
is there any particular reason you took a shit in a zip lock bag and left it in my refrigerator?
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
I was stretching naked in the middle of my room singing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow", apparently this is what I do when I'm high and the wifi goes out
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
Randomize
