all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
so he was shitfaced and kept using sticky notes to label everything like "beer spill" and "going to fuck later"
halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
I am compiling a playlist that reminds me of all my best sexual encounters. It shall be called THE MUSIC OF MY VAGINA'S PEOPLE
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
Randomize
