fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
If the EMT's ask later... I had 5 hour energy for breakfast and Four Loko for dinner... It might be important for them to know that
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
When one is stoned and browsing online dating profiles all men sound like serial killers.
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
my liver is dry heaving
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
Randomize
