Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
I just washed champagne and tuna off my body. I feel like that was a successful shower.
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
I don't know... But I do think this is probably the longest series of texts we've written discussing your cock. David was right, it is a brave new world. Also, slow day at work again?
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
He ate me out while watching Fifty Shades of Grey---needless to say I'm locking this down
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
Randomize
