Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
on the brightside, the semester can only get better from getting a dui at 8 am on the first day.
your optimism is becoming unhealthy
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
I really hope jumping jacks prevent pregancy because I'm kind of banking on it right now, do you know why there's a unicycle in the corner of my room?
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
Randomize