i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
Randomize
