one word: firstdatebathroomanal
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
If I don't singlehandedly make your gf realize she needs to straighten the fuck up or ruin your relationship before I leave I have failed you as a friend.
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
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