You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
Too much gin, very little bucket
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
Overslept. So hungover. Apparently texting the first person in my contact list the time I would like to wake up is not how the alarm clock in my phone actually works.
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
Randomize
