drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
Hey we met at the bar a week ago. Your friend gave me a rose and you asked about my nipples.
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
I am naked and annoyed.
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
I mean I'm completely serious and also drunk.
What a great combination.
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
Randomize