I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
I just had an epiphany. There is NOTHING TO STOP ME from making cake mix and eating it all instead of making a cake. It feels like my entire life has peaked at this moment.
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
Randomize
