I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
Sorry. My phone died in the middle of you explaining why we would never work as a couple. Whatever you were gonna say, I probably agree.
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
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