The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
Just a reminder- you dropped broccoli in my car and then felt bad for it and named him Henry
I know. I miss henry.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
I do have a moral compass! I can’t help it if it only points at penises
Randomize
