since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
I woke up still drunk to a beautiful tattooed columbian man making me pancakes. How's your memorial day?
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
Randomize
