I think I'm going to be in trouble for sneaking out last night. My Dad saw me drive up this morning when he was leaving early for work.
What'd you say?
I told him I was sleep driving
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
I just won a riveting game of "who can drink the most vodka out of a hollowed out watermelon". Fucking New Yorkers.
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
Randomize
