we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
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