There was a fist fight in my basement last night at four in the morning, in case you were wondering
What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
Memo to self- delete texts about butt sex from you before giving my mom my old phone to use.
WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
I am literally too baked to press the call button. How am I supposed to bone him?
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
Randomize