I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.
I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
Randomize
