He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
I went to the obgyn with chipped nail polish.. Somewhere Beyonce was looking down, shaking her head, whispering "Not fierce."
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
Two big black bouncers picked you up and escorted you to the elevator.
I didn't even do anything wrong. For all they knew I could have been on the US Olympic Gymnastic team. Would they kick Gabby Douglas out of a bar? I don't think so.
There is a drunken, assless white chick here at this bar wearing a shirt that says "REAL WOMEN TWERK FOR JESUS". I have officially had it with our generation.
What's the polite way to say "hey I don't actually want to fuck you, I just swiped right on you because you didn't like me in high school and I needed validation"
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
Just so you know, you called at 2 last night and kept making me tell you that I loved you and then when you got home you thanked me for walking you home. Incase you forgot, I'm still about 200 miles away.
Randomize
