Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
peeing is so easy when youre drunk. you just tell your body to pee and it pees.
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
Hey can you text me Heidi's phone number. I just stapled her mattress to the wall and I want to send her a picture of it.
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
Randomize
