we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
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