Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
you know you need to get laid when: getting wrestled to the ground in a self-defense class turns you on....p.s. this is a booty call
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize
