i barfeds in our rink
Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
Randomize
