I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
sleeping like a two year old who chased ambien with a bottle of whiskey.
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
Then you guys just all showered together...?
I'm too drunk to make ramen. What the fuck is this.
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
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