That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
You cant give me a fifth of god damn jim beam and expect me not to cheat on my gf.
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
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