He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
you traded sex for a burrito?
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
the most terrified I've ever been was seeing Danny Devito squirming on the ground in this underwear, covered in hand sanitizer, completely hairless
In the officer's defense, I was indeed pantless at the time he cuffed me, but there's a perfectly good explanation.
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
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