ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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