i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
One of my bosses just told me she's having communication problems because mercury is in retrograde this month. I think she's serious.
I'm like 99% sure I made out with Kevin Spacey last night. Not good.
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
I need water and some morals
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
Randomize
