I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
There was a lot of him and a little penis
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize
