so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
Randomize
