My friends, they love my intelligence
grandma shit on top of the toilet
After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
I need a $60 an hour job, because I have a $50 an hour drinking habit.
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
Look, I'm just saying, she looks like a troll and works indefinitely at a shitty Chinese restaurant, so me sleeping with her boyfriend is the least of her troubles...
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
Randomize
