Whod you bang
i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
You texted me "Americans are sad" and "chicken coop disaster" without any further explanation.
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
That's the last time you suggest we can get our tab wiped by out-drinking the bartender.
It was my card, so what do you care that you lost?
Is your card paying for my plan b?
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
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