32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
Michael Bay diarrhea
I want to see you every morning in the kitchen ass naykid on roller blades making pancakes.
Stop sending me these texts. This is your mom, not your girlfriend.
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
imagine playing with puppies while we're drunk.
Like... we could film it and put like, "do you believe in magic" as the backround song and it would be complete joy.
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
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