if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
Dude i just want you to know that when i found you half your mustache was already gone. I didn't do it.
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
That's good. So do you know why there is a giant pile of old tires in the laundry room and kitchen?
Well we knew you needed some tires, found someone on the way home who was giving them away and took them all. Has to be 4 in there you can use.
Randomize