so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
You were sitting at the bus stop holding hands with some Polish girl you just met, who was just as drunk as you were, and you kept trying to light your Kit Kat and smoke it.
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
I am not getting you a goat.
Fair enough. I am not going out with you. The goat was not negotiable.
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
Nope we are at the ER my brothers crazyass neighbor kinda stabbed him in the neck. He's gonna be fine.
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
Randomize
