My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
I drank half a bottle of wine while watching the Olympics opening ceremonies. I catcalled at handsome athletes. Stop me.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
Keep your fingers crossed. If I get to go to a Stanley Cup game I'll give you the blowjob he deserves for taking me. Because hes definitely not gettin it.
Randomize
