this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
Awesome, the library of congress archived all tweets. Now my great great grandchildren can pinpoint the date they inherited alcoholism.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
I can't believe I just compared my penis to a St. Bernard.
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
Walked off the dance floor to find Gabe hitting on a dad bod at the bar. It was my Dad. Awkward is an understatement.
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