woke up naked, spooning with wine bottle.. and my video chat was still open. fuck, not again.
if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
Randomize
